Asking for Forgiveness
How we ask for forgiveness is critical. If I accidentally spill a cup of hot coffee on you, I have not sinned against you, so I do not need to ask for forgiveness, but I should apologize for what I have done. On the other hand, if I throw a cup of coffee in your face, I have sinned against you. I must ask you to forgive me.
Is an apology the same as asking for forgiveness? NO, you must first name the specific sin, and then explicitly ask the person for forgiveness: "I was wrong to yell at you. Will you forgive me? I named the sin and asked for forgiveness. If I say, "I am sorry for yelling at you," and stop there, the typical response from the offended person is, "Oh, that's okay." What has happened? First, the offender has not admitted his sin. And second, the offended person has lied by minimizing the sin! It is not okay for someone to sin against another person! This false "forgiveness" is unbiblical. And it can be very destructive to relationships over time.
Is an apology the same as asking for forgiveness? NO, you must first name the specific sin, and then explicitly ask the person for forgiveness: "I was wrong to yell at you. Will you forgive me? I named the sin and asked for forgiveness. If I say, "I am sorry for yelling at you," and stop there, the typical response from the offended person is, "Oh, that's okay." What has happened? First, the offender has not admitted his sin. And second, the offended person has lied by minimizing the sin! It is not okay for someone to sin against another person! This false "forgiveness" is unbiblical. And it can be very destructive to relationships over time.
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